I'm laying it all out!
It all started a few days before our Spring break bike trip where I wanted to be prepared with a full and ready to use inhaler because my asthma can act up in the wind...
bicycle + the coast = lots of wind.
March 16, 2016
So I quickly made an appt. with my family doctor to fill the prescription. I ran over during my lunch break and while I was visiting with doctor I asked her about some other symptoms I'd been having... Back pain, some cramping, tender boobs (sorry, this may be TMI but then stop reading because this is my blog and I can do what I want.). Basically I felt like I was having a period, but with no bleeding. So the doctor was all "when was your last period" and I was a bit late, but I haven't had a very regular cycle like ever and although I am on Metformin, I haven't been super trying to have a baby because I needed a break from all the emotional up and down and fertility meds and hormone craziness that trying to conceive brings. So the doctor says "why don't you take a pregnancy test?" and I said, "um no I don't take pregnancy tests because they are ALWAYS negative and I don't really feel like another disappointment today." She peer-pressured me into doing it anyways.
I waited in the doctors room, for the negative result, doctor comes in a few minutes later and says...
"YOU'RE PREGNANT"
Then I said
"no, I'm not"
Then she said
"Yes, you are"
Then I said
"no, I'm not"
Then she said
"Yes, you are"
Then I said
"That's impossible"
Then she said
"Obviously not"
Okay, you get it, but I was half trying not to cry and half in shock and disbelief at this point.
Then I hurried along back to work and tried my best to concentrate on my students without them thinking I was a weirdo as I would smile and cry a Denzel tear while holding my newly pregnant belly at random intervals during my lesson.
I got home and tied a note to my dog Belle's collar that said "hey daddy, I'm going to be a big sister!" so that when she ran up to Jeremy he would see it. He admitted that at first he was like "seriously Tessa, you got another dog?" but a few seconds later caught on... It's just the most unexpected thing and the furtherest thing from our minds almost!
Now, just to make sure, I went and bought a pregnancy test... mostly just to be like
"Who's positive now, pregnancy test!?"
Is it weird that I needed to see this more than I trusted my pee test at the doctor?
Since I have a plethora of problems with my dumb body, doctor suggested I keep calm and book an appt at my OBGYN asap. The appt was AFTER our bike trip, so I took it pretty easy.
Look, I know that women have babies in wars and crack houses, but they usually haven't been trying for 4 years to do so, so I resolved to do everything I can to do everything right. I talked to a nurse that said "if it's a good pregnancy, it will stay" which gave me hope.
On a personal note (let's get real, this is all personal), Jer and I had started saving our $$ bills to do InVetro fertilization this coming October. We saw another fertility (4th one) specialist in January that suggested we skip the laparoscopy surgery and IUI's and go straight for the one that is most expensive but that also has the highest chance of success. Doctor said that I could go on birth control until then which would help regulate my hormones and then I wouldn't experience periods from the devil himself each month and my other nasty side effects that come with having PCOS and endometriosis. I was all "sign me up!" but Jeremy was all in tune with a little personal revelation saying "let's keep trying the natural way if you can get through the pain". Little did we know that one month later this would happen
<3
On March 30th we went in and saw this:
A tiny tiny little lentil with a strong heart beat.
I measured only about 5 weeks along, so I found out super early, which is really good i think... who know's maybe I would have pushed myself too hard on our bike trip or sat in the hot tub too long or done something dumb if I didn't go in for a new inhaler! I definitely did not think I was pregnant. Have a said that yet?
I got the list of things not to eat. I took a blood glucose test that was high- women with PCOS have a higher risk of gestational diabetes. I peed in a cup. I got my first UTI- no wonder I was peeing on the hour, every hour! I found out I am anemic and need more iron. I'm working on getting my body in tip top shape, don't worry.
On April 13th I went in again.
BTW, have you met the wand? {insert crying face emoji}
My lentil is now a walnut with little flaps for arms and legs and here, I was 8 weeks and 2 days along with EDD of November 23rd.
Baby has a very strong heart beat, it implanted in a good place and everything looks perfect. I am hopeful for a successful pregnancy. My cysts on my ovaries are gone, my endometriosis sores are healing and my pregnancy hormones are taking over! Because of my reverted uterus and it seeming to double in size with a STAB STAB STAB to my stomach every day, I do get a bit more cramping than most.
While I am highly sensitive to smells and am as bloated as a whinnie the pooh shaped bear balloon, I have only thrown up three times in my 9 weeks (with bouts of nausea throughout the day) and cannot eat meat or anything with a strong smell. No cravings yet. My UTI is all good now and I'm feeling much better. I can't tell if I am tired at the end of the day because I've been at work or because I'm growing a person.
I'm actually glad to be working in the beginning of my pregnancy because it helps me power through feeling pretty awful at times.Otherwise I would just be sitting at home feeling icky and happy and being all emotional about it.
Here is me looking exhausted and nauseous after getting poked with a needle 4 times over 3 hours while I fasted and took a glucose test. (which I passed, wahoo!) BTW If I start feeling sick, and I quickly eat something it goes away, so this glucose test was HELL, and if I threw up it wouldn't count and I'd have to do it again. #staydownthrowup
And then...
my first baby bump pic that's mostly bloat picture at 9 weeks :)
[At the end of the day and after a good dinner,
you'd better believe I looks 5 months pregnant already!]
I'll keep posting up dates until we are ready to tell the world around 14/15 weeks. our close friends and family already know... we've been bursting to tell because miracles do happen!
Review:
I tried natural supplements; essential oils, seeing a homeopathic Doctor, taking iodine, saw palmetto, dong quai, chaste berry, maca, inositol, evening primrose oil, and tribulis. I tried drinking spearmint tea three times a day. Then I tried red raspberry tea. I tried bio identical hormone replacement therapy. I tried yoga and no stress and smelling babies. I tried no dairy. I tried juicing. I fasted, prayed and hoped. I tried taking my temperature every single day for years. I tried clomid- 11 rounds!!!! I tried Metformin. I tried clomid + Metformin. I tried the Paleo diet. I tried timing. I tried keeping my legs elevated, I tried standing on my head. I've seen 7 different doctors. It's been 4 years. I've had all blood tests done. I've had numerous pelvic ultra sounds 
I've had iodine injected into my Fallopian tubes. I suffer unbearable pain every month. I've watched friends, sisters and teenagers have healthy babies. I've cried, I've been okay. I've been given the odds of a 2% chance of natural conception. I have Polycystic ovarian syndrome, endometriosis and reverted uterus. I have nasty symptoms and side effects. I planned on invetro this October! I've had early miscarriages.
I know miracles happen.
I had hope. And... MY EGGO IS PREGGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hallelujah!
Due November 23! Miracles do happen!
#gottogoihavetopee #a2%chanceisstillachance
I felt pretty crummy around 10, 11, 12 weeks. Gagging every time I brush my teeth, bouts of nausea, aches and terribly tired.
ALL THE WONDERFUL THINGS I HAVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG TO FEEL!
I'm all gagging from some strong smell and smiling because I LOVE it
Or getting a sharp pain in my tummy because it's growing and smiling because I love it
Or feeling so terribly tired but still happy because I love the reason why!!!
This pic below is my new mantra. But seriously.
I feel like the laziest person in the world!
Here is my little belly at 10 weeks.
So at this point NO FOOD SOUNDS GOOD. EVER.
I ended up eating pancakes for 3 days.
Raisinets for breakfast. Don't judge me.
I went in for the genetic testing at 12 weeks. No news is good news and we've had no news, wahoo!
Here is a nice profile picture of baby.
Mothers day this year was a happy occasion in in our home for the first time in years :)
Here is a pic of me at 12 weeks on Mother's day.
13 weeks.
14 weeks
No bump, just my happy smiling face
Still really struggling to find things that sound good to eat.
On this day, giant pizza seemed like a good option though.
Also a good visual of me getting home after work, sitting on the couch and not moving until I move to my bed. #LAZY
Side note: I left the (gas) stove burner on all night long, the garage door open, loose my keys 5 times a day etc. This whole pregnancy brain is a real thing. I've turned into a big idiot!
I had a bit of a scare on Thursday (5-26) Just barely 14 weeks along.
Jeremy was in Alaska fishing for the whole week- bad timing because i'm useless without him right now!!!
I had some spotting and really bad cramping- I could barely stand up without it hurting. I ended up getting a sub during 2nd period and came home to rest. After a little nap, I was still crampy so I went in to the Urgent Care for some peace of mind. I got a really awesome, thorough doctor. She took my vitals, took lots of blood, had an ultrasound-saw baby moving around and its heart was beating! (huge relief!) They then gave me an IV for some extra fluid and I did feel much better (after peeing 600 times!) It was a big wake up call to slow it down even more- a difficult task while teaching 12 & 13 year-olds all day long. I rested all day long and the cramping is more like a dull pain and only hurts more when I move. It was a scary day mostly because I was alone.
I do, however, have awesome friends and little angels in my life that came to care for me. Daniel and Brad came and gave me a blessing, Sara brought me dinner. Leslie brought me dinner and a popsicle and sat and talked with me for some company and helped calm me.
I guess I'm just feeling and experiencing all these new things so quickly.
Needless to say, I did nothing for 3 days straight after this.
Pretty much all of my students have figured out that I'm pregnant and not just getting super fat. So before he heard it from someone else, I went in and told my principle during week 14. My students are seriously so sweet, very excited for me, they've been great and love asking me lots of questions!
One of them, came up to me with this box of Ferrero Rocher chocolates and said "When my mom was pregnant with my baby brother, all she wanted to eat was these chocolates, so we went to the store last night and got you some" MELT MY HEART! Sooooo sweet!!
I have gained 2 lbs this week, I'm now 117lbs, and my belly is so big and tight I don't know how it's going to get any bigger!!!
I have ordered some new clothes that will be more comfortable for me- I can't do the zips or buttons of any of my pants and everything feels so tight against my belly.
I did not think that life would change so much even when you are just pregnant and don't even have the baby yet. Keeping something alive is already my 24 hour job. #momalready
Here is me at 15 weeks :)
happy, happy, happy
It's about to be the last week of school, so I have been busy preparing my classroom for the summer and next year and also a long-term-sub.
Now anyone can come in, open my draw, find the week we are in, grab the folder, follow the plans, and teach my class!
My fortune was correct! School is out and summer is here!
I can take more time to look after myself and relax!
My baby is as big as a lemon!
I'm excited to be out of my 1st trimester and into my 2nd!
The average temperature in the Bakersfield summer is 100* (38*C) and it is hot hot hot. When we aren't swimming with friends or floating the river... we improvise to stay cool! #instyle hahaha
16 WEEKS
Went in for a check up- the doc totally could have told me baby's gender but only listened for that strong little heart beat, beating at 150BPM :) My blood pressure is low 100/40 which explains my dizziness, my iron, calcium and potassium could be better... I'm working on it.
I'll have to wait for my 20 week ultrasound to find out the gender, I'm not really in a rush- I'm not going to buy blue or pink everything... mostly I'm stressed about giving my child a NAME. I want to change my dog Belle's name all the time, how will I be able to name a person? sheesh!
Nothing fits!!! Plus, it's hot.... I went shopping, tried on the whole store and only left with the black dress (insert eye rolling emoji)
I am so so so happy to be pregnant and carrying this miracle, but it seems more of a miracle to find something that fits over my belly these days!!!
I have been going to the gym every day since school got out- It's been 3 weeks now and I'm going strong. I'm feeling good and have a lot more energy. Each day I do some cardio and lift weights (safely) I enjoy spin classes, I can't really run anymore so I do the elliptical or stair stepper. Then i switch days doing my back and biceps, chest and triceps, and legs and shoulders. Notice, there are no ab workouts in there!! I also make sure to do some yoga or zumba once in the week.
Gym clothes are even getting tighter at
17 WEEKS
I also treated myself and got a new hair do :)
Before -> after
A lot of my PCOS symptoms have calmed down, most noticeably my "male patterned balding"
Wahoooooooo!!!
I feel like a woman!
We've been "nesting" and working on some fun projects in the house.
Jeremy made this beautiful Wayne's coating trim in the living room.
I've been working on the baby room mountain mural... finished pictures will come later
We made a bench for the dining table- now we can fit more than 4 people around it!
I went to a healthy pregnancy class and learned some new things... one of them was that you should avoid eating Halibut fish while pregnant... oopsy! I've been eating a lot since Jeremy came home from Alaska with 100lbs of it!
Honestly, I'm still having major food aversions. The only thing that ever sounds moderately good to eat is raspberries, pancakes and occasionally pizza... which I threw up the other day, so maybe i'm off pizza for a while too- the list is narrowing!!! I always thought I'd look after myself so well and to get as many nutrients as possible, but eating is the biggest chore.
At almost 18 weeks I'm STILL getting headaches every single day. Some days it's just a dull pain and others it seems more like a migraine. I've been getting a headache that lasts the rest of the day every day around 2/4pm since my 12th week of pregnancy. I've tried massage, essential oils, tylenol, cold cloth, dark room, sleep- you name it. I got so sick of it the other day that I went out and bought a coke. I drank half the bottle and it actually did the trick! My headache went away!
I don't usually drink caffeine and definitely haven't had any since I got pregnant BUT
I was sitting on the couch starting to feel better, and what did I feel?
A little TAP TAP TAP, POKE POKE POKE!!!! On the inside!!!
Baby likes Coke... or he/she was just all jazzed from the caffeine! Since recognizing the actual feeling of baby's movement, I have felt it move quite a lot and I love it!!!
I'm now 18 WEEKS
Do my bike shorts make my BUMp look fat?
and feeling pretty good- I'm not complaining BUT I threw up so much yesterday that I lost 3 pounds. Today, I am slowly sipping on water and watered down powerade and snacking on all things healthy. I will be taking it easy if you need me! I'm 123 lbs now (usually) and doctor says that's great. Weird to gain 8 lbs in 4.5 months and be okay with it.
Brian, Lexie and Kai came for a visit. I am so glad that our little bean will have two cousins born in the same year as him/her!
19 Weeks
Feeling great! Feeling lots of kicks and movement. They are so distracting! I'll be talking to someone and I'll be like "shhhh hold on, baby is moving, I have to concentrate!"
20 WEEKS!!!!
HALF WAY THERE ALREADY!
We find out the gender on Wednesday, that is 3 more sleeps and I am Sooooo excited!!!
I will start a new blog post for the second half of my pregnancy and when we know if we are having a boy or a girl. Jeremy thinks it's going to be a girl. I don't care what it is as long as it's healthy :)
Always remember:
MIRACLES HAPPEN <3
